During the course of the day, homeschooling and taking care of everything else, my children and I can become very detached from each other. We do our thing, fall into our respective roles. Sometimes before we know it, the day is almost over and very little of emotional significance has transpired. I feel a sense of loss, emptiness and sadness when I realize this.
Take hugs, for example. The other day, which was indeed very busy, I noticed that we had not hugged each other. My children seemed crankier than was warranted for the kind of day we were having. I stopped and gave each a long hug. It was like magic. What an improvement in all our moods.
After a little digging, I found out there have been studies done that suggests that people need hugs in order to survive. Actually, they get really specific about the need for hugs – for simple survival, you need at least four hugs a day! If we want our children to grow, you must hug them at least twelve times!
The studies explain what should be obvious- that children develop feelings of security and self-esteem from that contact with us.
So among our many to dos during the day, we have added a hug chart. We hug as we pass by each other, as we work on a problem together etc. It’s become a game of sorts. It goes without saying, at least from my perspective, that my kids seem to learn and retain more when they felt a loving hug from one of their parents. Just one more incentive!
Article By Nuria Almeida
Picture By Aunt Owwee